City of God

I cried when I finished reading Paper Towns, though I have no idea why. I just kind of felt the need for some reason. Something about finishing such an amazing novel made me sad I guess. I maybe happy. Or both.

Every time I finish reading a book by John Green I feel so at peace, so…incredibly alive, like I can do anything.
After I read Looking For Alaska I wanted to go to boarding school in the south and smoke a cigarette by the side of a lake as the sun was setting.
After I read An Abundance of Katherines I wanted to go on a cross-country road trip with Alex Frantela and Scott Deiro and make friends with complete strangers, exploring life’s infinite possibilities.
After reading Paper Towns…I want to do everything. I want to plan an extravagant adventure during the middle of the night with someone amazing and solve mysteries that were never ment to be solved in the first place.

I crave life. I want to feel like I can conquer the world with my bare hands. I want to be infinitely happy.


My problem is that I don’t like to let go. I sit in a pool of nostalgia for far too long whenever there is change. I don’t finish what I start. I’m incomplete. I’m imperfect, though that isn’t surprising; no one is perfect, anyhow.




Song of the day: “The Only Exception” by Paramore
Film of the day: City of God (2002)
Book of my life: Paper Towns by John Green


I’m on my way to believing.